By Chris Neave, Sempai at Way of the Spiritual Warrior

I have always been larger than the average person, I was the fat kid at school, the one who had lots of friends who were girls and no girlfriends, the last in any race, the first picked for the rugby team but the last to catch up with play. I was always the butt of jokes and the one they laughed at in the changing room.

I was bullied physically and mentally by a group of lads the whole time I was at secondary school and years later when bumping into one of these guys I asked why? And he said honestly (to be fair to him) “coz you were fat”. During that time I hated myself and on several occasions I tried stupidly to end it all. When I left school I weighed a huge 18 stone at 15 years old and at the time was only 5’8”.

My brothers were all in the army following the footsteps of our father and I wanted to make them proud by following them also. I started jogging every morning starting with half a mile and that killed me, for the first month I vomited half way round the circuit and then again when I got home, so many times I thought “sod it” and was going to give up but I carried on, after 7 months I was running 5 miles every day and the weight was noticeably dropping off me, my brother came home on leave and dragged me to the careers office where I undertook my medical and fitness evaluation, in those seven months I had grown 3” and lost 4 and a half stone. The sergeant in the careers office, a big guy with a huge beer belly (not really showing a good example) came out and said that my fitness was good enough to join any regiment including the Para’s but, I still needed to lose half a stone before I would be allowed to join and the next intake was in a fortnights time,

I started running further and faster every morning over the following week, when I was asked to play football for my college team. (This was the first time I had been picked to play football since first school.) I was buzzing with excitement leading up to the game when finally it came round I walked out on that pitch feeling a sense of achievement. No longer the fat kid, last in the race, the butt of the fat jokes and no one laughed at me in the changing room. I remember looking back and thanking the heavens that I never managed to end it all. The game began and I played out of my skin, by half time we were 3-1 up, I had scored 2 and created the third. I went out in the second half continuing where I left off creating a fourth when disaster struck. I was running down the wing just ready to cross the ball when this donkey of a right back lunged in with a tackle from behind… The instant he made contact with my ankles I knew it was bad as the pain instantly ran up my leg. I lay on the pitch face down, still, not moving, with tears running down my face. They were not tears of pain although I was feeling a great deal of that. The tears were of sadness for the fact that I knew the 8 months of mental and physical pain trying to battle my weight issues as well as the mental scars I had been inflicted with as a kid had all come to a shuddering halt.

Down the hospital waiting for the x-ray results I remember seeing my dad outside and all I could think was I was so close to making you as proud of me as you are of my brothers. The results came back as a broken left ankle and a badly sprained right ankle and I would be off my feet for 4 to 6 months. I couldn’t walk for six months and couldn’t run comfortably for about fourteen months. As you can imagine the weight piled on ten times faster than it came off and the running became too much, so I gave up.

By the time I was 20 I weighed 20 stone and each year without fail I put a stone on. Each year I would diet and fluctuate half a stone down then a full stone up, each diet fad that came by I tried and failed. I went to the gym and swam day in day out and although working for a while losing a few pounds here and there, it soon stopped and the weight started to rise again.

Christmas last year (2004) I had had enough and decided to go to my GP to ask why I couldn’t lose weight, he said it was down to will power and common sense, he said keep changing your diet is as bad for you as not watching what you eat at all. He weighed me and to my horror I weighed almost 27 stone. Now my GP is a family friend and a very nice guy and he asked me to sit down. He said “Chris, I am going to be brutally honest with you, if you do not lose weight you will start to have health problems by the time you are 30 and I would say you may only live for another 5 to 10 years”. I always knew in the back of my mind that my weight was no good for my health but it was only then that I truly realised that this was so serious I had to do something about it.

I had a good Christmas and went into denial for a short time. It came to early February and I decided enough was enough it was time to go to the mattresses. I sat down and set about a plan of action. Diet. What was I going to do? Something new? Something I had done before? What? I decided that my will power although good was not as strong as it could be, so I thought what can I do that would make my will power continue no matter what? I decided to try weight watchers!!

I found a weight watchers club round the corner from my house and decided the following week I would go and see what it was about. I got to the hall about 10 minutes late and walked into what can only be described as hell on earth. The room was packed full of women of all shapes and sizes, talking away when all of a sudden the talking stopped and all eyes were on me. I could feel my face going crimson. An angel appeared on my right shoulder and said “go on Chris, you’ve got nothing to worry about” followed by a devil on the opposite shoulder shouting, “get the hell out of dodge and run like the wind fat boy”………….

I stayed, filled in the appropriate forms and joined the queue to be weighed. I could hear whispers and giggles and although everyone in the room was there for the same reason I felt like I was back at school in the changing room conscious that all eyes were on me. Finally I was at the front of the queue, I took off my coat and shoes, walked over to the scales, the room fell quiet, for the second time all eyes were on me, I stepped up and watched the electronic digits rise and rise, 21stone 3lbs…24stone 8lbs…25stone 10 lbs…It finally rested on 26stone 13lbs, the women who was checking my form looked at the scales and in the loudest voice she could muster bellowed “YOUR START WEIGHT IS 26STONE 13LBS”. At that instant the whispers and giggles started again. I had never felt so embarrassed in all my life. I decided at that point that I would never again put myself in that situation.

For the following 2 weeks I stuck to the points system I was given and I lost 6lbs, then the following week still sticking to the points I put on 2lb and I thought “oh no” had it stopped working already? Had I stuck to the points properly? I decided that I needed to do some exercise.

Exercise. What exercise was best? Could I stand going running again? Would my ankle be up to that? No I needed to lose a few stone before I went running. The Gym? No I hated it with a vengeance, so boring and the more it works the more you have to do. Then all of a sudden BING, a thought hit me like Mike Tyson’s left hook. What about Martial Arts.

I had studied Aikido as a teenager for 2 and half years and loved it; the only reason I stopped was because the club disbanded. Then the doubts set in. Was I fit enough to do martial arts? Did I have the commitment to stick at it? Was there a club close enough? Would people take the piss because of my size? The angel appeared again “go for it you have nothing to lose” followed again by the devil “Don’t even bother, you have as much chance being a ballet dancer as you have being a martial artist, you’ll make a fool of yourself and you’ll probably get your arse kicked”

I searched the net for martial art clubs in my area and was surprised to find an abundance of clubs of all styles. The one that stood out to me was obviously the Aikido Club. I immediately emailed them asking them about the club and also stated my reservations about my weight and fitness. A week went by with no reply and I thought maybe they felt my weight and fitness was too much of an issue. Then when the reply finally came I was shocked at the positive response. Kuma Aikido was a traditional Aikido club that was only started in September 2004 run by Sensei Nigel Turley and his partner and Sempai Jane. Jane answered my mail saying

“Hi Chris,

I would say that Aikido will help you with your fitness but it may not help you to lose weight. What it does do is turn fat into muscle. It helps to tone a body rather than tone it down. However the fact that you are exercising can be nothing but beneficial. The only thing stopping you from attending is yourself. If you do not have a problem with your size, then neither do we. Please come along and have a look at the way a class is done. If you feel comfortable, then join in, either when you come along or on the next class. We train on a Monday at Nuneaton fire station. Adult class starts at 7.45pm. We look forward to seeing you.

Live life as though each day is a new beginning.

Jane”

That final statement has stuck in my head ever since. The following Monday I went down and began training.

After 2 weeks I was hooked and was desperate to train more than once a week, the nearest aikido clubs were 30 or 40 miles away and I really didn’t want to travel that far week in week out, so I decided to look for another art within my area. I emailed and rang several karate and kung fu clubs and received mixed responses. One of which almost made me give up on the whole thing completely. I won’t mention names but it was a shoalin Kung Fu club near Coventry, upon emailing the club I received a response asking to ring the chief instructor. I rang the guy who answered in a very abrupt manner, I told him who I was and he said, “ I read your mail and we wouldn’t be interested in teaching you because you are too unfit and overweight to be able to participate in our art. Also due to you training in Aikido your commitment would not be solely with us”. I had a similar response from a kick boxing club and a couple of karate clubs, but not to the insulting extent as the one above.

Then I received a response from a Club in Coventry, run by Renshi Tony Pillage. He wrote

“I think it would be best (as my typing is ridiculously slow) to give me a call on 02476 331239 and we can discuss this matter further. I am sure that we can put a programme in place to work with you.
Many thanks
Anthony”

The following week I attended my first class and instantly I was hooked, I liked that the club was so open minded to all arts and styles, instantly I was made welcome. I trained 8 times over the following fortnight. During this time my weight dropped by 12lbs. I was hooked. I trained between 2 and 6 times a week over the next few months and quickly rose up the ranks. Renshi Pillage became a great friend and one of the biggest influences; I owe him a lot of thanks for his positive outlook on everything and the confidence he has instilled in me. I now sempai for the club on a Friday night.

I have since started training in Wing Chun, studying once a week under Sifu Steve Dyde at the Academy of Wing Chun in Nuneaton.

I went to Cyprus to Russell Stutely’s training camp in November. I went with a little apprehension regarding my weight and although it was obvious that I was the least fit and the most overweight. I felt I kept up with the pace fairly well. I spoke to a few guys over there including Herol “the Bomber” Graham and they were all very honest about my weight but very kind with their advice and words of encouragement.

Over the year I had a total loss of 3 stone 13lbs, I have since put on the 13lbs but I am ready to go the other way again now. I would like to loose 7 stone and would like to do it publicly on this site beginning the 1st of February, I intend to post pictures of me (in my pants, don’t get too excited Gav or Tony I promise I won’t come between you in any way, shape or form) once a month so you can all see (hopefully) a visible change. I will also be posting my weight and measurements every month so you can see the numerical change and I will submit a short diary of my diet and my exercise/training each week with complete honesty.

Please send any advice or words of encouragement you have, and feel free to give me S£$t if I’m letting myself down at any point. I am sharing with you all the things I hate about myself most in the hope that it will spur me on to achieve my goal and hopefully it may inspire some of you to improve your fitness and health which in turn will make me and hopefully some of you happier, healthier people and in turn better Martial Artists.

Many Thanks for reading
Chris

Many thanks to Chris for allowing us to publish his article. You can keep on with his progress and make sure it is progress at the Mind, Body and Kick Ass Moves forum